


My Hero

by Ocelot_l



Category: Atop the Fourth Wall, Channel Awesome, That Guy with the Glasses
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hugs, Loss, Male Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-23
Updated: 2012-09-23
Packaged: 2017-11-15 21:40:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/532063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ocelot_l/pseuds/Ocelot_l
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events of To Boldly Flee Linkara puts on a brave face, but even heroes need to break down once in a while.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Hero

It was close to midnight when Linkara’s team made it back to the base. They’d all had a blast joining Harvey’s musical tour of the tri-state area and had plenty of stories to share with Linkara, from 90s Kid’s failed attempt to crowd-surf, to Ninja-Style Dancer’s brief stint as a Chorus Girl-Style Dancer, and they crowded around Linkara’s futon eager to share their stories.

“I’d love to hear all about it, guys,” Linkara told them before anyone could get a word out, “but I’m pretty wiped right now, and I suspect you are as well. Why don’t we pick this up in the morning when my head isn’t swimming with crappy comics and other stuff I’m sure you aren’t interested in hearing about.”

His eyes did appear to be bloodshot and he was considerably paler than usual, so the team agreed a good night’s sleep would do them all a world of good. After bidding Linkara good night, they each retired to their bedrooms and quickly dozed off.

Well, they all did save for 90s Kid. The teen was still pumped from the awesome adventure he’d just experienced and no matter how tightly he closed his eyes or how still he tried to lay in his bed, he just couldn’t fall asleep. After thirty minutes of trying, 90s Kid declared sleep to be bogus anyway, so he jumped out of bed and decided to satisfy another one of his needs, namely hunger.

90s Kid padded out to the kitchen and pulled out a box of Sugar-Frosted Chocoballs and some milk. As he crunched upon his favorite midnight snack, he noticed the light in the living room was still on.

“Linkara must be totally working hard,” he mused. “But he looked all tired and junk. Must be, like, a killer episode coming up.” Upon finishing his snack, 90s Kid placed his dish in the sink and crept over to the doorway, intending to take a quick peek at Linkara before heading back to his room.

His eyes widened behind his shades when he took in the sight before him. Linkara was lying face-up on the futon, unmoving, hands covering his face. His script and comic had fallen forgotten onto the floor and the camera was turned off, while on his chest was a photograph that was resting picture-side down. Linkara remained that way for several moments, his breathing shallow, his body still and silent. 

Concern instantly flooded through 90s Kid and he tip-toed over to the futon, wondering if perhaps Linkara was sick or hurt in some way. Upon reaching the older man’s side, 90s Kid was shocked to hear what sounded like a sniffle slip out from under his hands.

“Uh, Linkara?”

At once Linkara was sitting up, snatching the photo with one hand, while his expression contorted into something that was supposed to appear calm. He quickly rubbed at his eyes before glancing over at the teen.

“90s Kid. What are you still doing up?”   

“I, uh, couldn’t sleep dude. I came out for a snack and I, like, saw the light on…” 90s Kid trailed off when he realized how watery Linkara’s eyes looked. “Dude, are you… crying?”

“What? No, of course not.” Linkara turned his head away from 90s Kid and rubbed his eyes again with more force. “I’m just tired, that’s all.”

“Um, okay, dude.” 90s Kid was unconvinced, but he didn’t feel right about pressing the issue. “You, um, look kinda not-awesome right now, so maybe you should get to bed too.”

Linkara nodded and stood up. “I know. I really should just try to rest so I can forget about this whole thing.”

As 90s Kid was about to ask what was the thing Linkara wanted to forget about, he noticed the picture had slipped from his grasp and fluttered to the floor. “Hey, it’s you and that angry dude who yells about all those radical movies.” 90s Kid picked up the photo and smiled at the image of Linkara with his arm around the Nostalgia Critic. A smile that quickly disappeared when he noticed a tear sliding down Linkara’s cheek. “Dude, what’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing,” Linkara insisted, trying to turn around so 90s Kid wouldn’t see him wipe his eyes yet again. “It’s just… it’s stupid.”

“I bet it’s totally not,” 90s Kid said with surprising tenderness in his voice. “If you’re sad or junk, I bet it’s for reasons, Linkara. You wanna, like, talk or something?” He reached out tentatively before resting his hand on Linkara’s shoulder in as comforting a manner as he could.

Linkara hated showing weakness around anyone, most of all his team who depended on him to be strong, but when he felt that warmth on his shoulder, it was like a dam burst inside him. The whole recent series of events spilled out of his mouth, from Mechakara attacking and locking him in a closet, to impersonating him on the Critic’s house-ship, to Linkara’s escape and assistance of his fellow reviewers, ending with what he knew about the Critic’s sacrifice to save them all.

90s Kid couldn’t pretend to understand all of what Linkara was saying, but he managed to guide him back down onto the futon midway through the story and sat beside him listening attentively as Linkara poured his guts out.

“Um, but aren’t your friends always, like, dying and coming back?” he asked after Linkara had paused to take a breath. 

“It’s different this time,” Linkara replied. He took the picture back from the teen and stared down at it sadly. “He’s not really dead, he’s merged with the universe, or something. There’s no way to undo an event like that. I can’t clone him, I can’t use a Phoenix Down, I can’t use any of my magic-I can’t do anything, 90s Kid!”

His fists tightened in anger, crumpling the picture slightly, so 90s Kid gently extracted it from his grasp.

“I’m so sorry, dude,” he told him, wishing he could find something wiser or cooler to say. “But like, if he’s the universe or whatever, doesn’t that mean he’s all around us? Like, watching over us all the time?”

Linkara blinked slowly, considering this. “I guess that could be the case. I think some of the others have said he’s found a way to contact them for a short amount of time, so it’s not like we can never see him again.” He sighed then in frustration and pulled off his glasses so he could rub the bridge of his nose. “But it shouldn’t have to be like this. Critic shouldn’t have had to sacrifice himself like that! I should have been there sooner to help him, to help all of them! Everyone calls me a damned hero, so isn’t it my job to make sure my friends are safe?”

“Dude, you are a hero,” 90s Kid replied, looking at Linkara with worry. “You totally save so many people all the time. But you can’t save everyone every time, man. You, like, aren’t invincible or stuff. Mecha-dude is totally dangerous and you’re so lucky he didn’t kill you.” 90s Kid shuddered at the thought of that horrible robot hurting his friend but Linkara only seemed to grow angrier with the mention of his name.

“Mechakara .That creep. If it weren’t for him, I would have been on that ship with them the whole time. I would have been there for them, for Critic!” He was starting to get worked up again so 90s Kid laid a hand on his arm, trying to calm him.

“Linkara, it’s okay-”

“No, it’s not! I can’t believe him, I just can’t believe that stupid robot had the nerve to impersonate me in front of my friends! Friends, I should add, that they were didn’t even realize it wasn’t me the whole frigging time!” Linkara’s eyes started burning with rage. “What the hell was that anyway? Are people really that stupid? What kinds of friends don’t even recognize when you’ve been replaced by an imposter?”

“Dude, it happens more often than you’d think.” 90s Kid couldn’t help sounding the slightest bit annoyed when he said that, but his intention was to diffuse Linkara’s anger. It worked too well, unfortunately, since the light in the hero’s eyes dimmed at once as he focused on 90s Kid.

“Oh God… I completely forgot about… 90s Kid, I’m so sorry.”

“Forget it, man. That’s, like, all in the past.” 90s Kid smiled a little to help put Linkara at ease. To his horror, Linkara’s eyes started welling up again.

“Is that how you felt after you came back? Angry at us for being so stupid not to recognize you were gone, hurt at how little we cared, disgusted, betrayed…”

“Dude, no!” 90s Kid shook his head wildly, trying to convince him he was wrong. “I mean at first, I was sort of bummed about it, but now-”

“Why would you feel any differently now?” Linkara looked down to his lap and sniffled loudly, another tear sliding down his cheeks. “What kind of a hero am I? I can’t protect my friends, I can’t protect my team… what good am I?”

Linkara’s body sagged, like someone had let the air out of a balloon, and the tears started to fall in a steady stream. He would have slid right off the futon onto the floor if 90s Kid hadn’t wrapped his arms around him and pulled him against his chest. Instinctively Linkara hugged him tightly and buried his face into the teen’s shoulder, where he cried without stopping for quite some time.

“Linkara, you’re totally good.” 90s Kid spoke softly to the other man, one hand awkwardly patting his back while he talked. “You’re the greatest hero ever, man. The world wouldn’t be here without you. I wouldn’t be here, dude. Bad stuff happens, yeah, but it’s so not your fault. You’re, like, the one who tries and makes it better. I know it hurts now, and I’m sorry, man, but you have to know it’s not cuz of you that it happened. Linkara, you’re totally awesome and… you’re always gonna be my hero, no matter what.”

90s Kid continued to hold his weeping friend even as he ran out of things to say. Talking about emotional things was never his forte, no matter how many episodes of Care Bears he watched, but he was determined to be there for Linkara for as long as he wanted him. 

 Eventually his tears dried and Linkara was able to sit back up. He wiped at his face with tissues handed to him by 90s Kid and managed to face him again with the hint of a smile on his lips.

“Thanks, 90s Kid. I actually do feel better now. Sorry you had to see me like that. I guess I shouldn’t keep trying to hold everything in all the time or I’ll explode again all over someone.”

“Dude, it’s no biggie,” 90s Kid told him. “If you wanna talk I’m always here. Literally, cuz I live here!”

Linkara chuckled weakly and shook his head. “You always make me laugh, 90s Kid.” While 90s Kid beamed with pride from such a compliment, Linkara turned his gaze to the picture in his hands. “I know Critic wouldn’t blame me for what happened. I guess I just... miss him is all. He was a brat and baby and huge jackass that almost got me killed several times, but… he was my friend.”

“He’s still your friend, dude. He’s not here now, but you’ll totally see him again one day.” Linkara looked at 90s Kid with surprise before his smile grew.

“You know, you’re right. Remind me to listen to you more often.” 

“Sure, man.” As Linkara slipped the picture back into his jacket pocket, he caught sight of the time.

“Oh jeez, look how late it is. Sorry for keeping you out here so long.”

“It’s cool, man,” 90s Kid said with a dismissive shrug. “I was too stoked to sleep anyway. Still am.”

“You must have had a really good trip. Would you mind telling me about it? It might help me sleep better to hear about something good happening for a change.” Linkara glanced down at his hands, slightly embarrassed at the admission, but 90s Kid took no notice.

“Sure, dude! I have tons of stories that will totally make you forget all about this sad junk!” 90s Kid immediately launched into a tale about Linksano getting into an argument with a lighting technician that led to the scientist being slightly electrocuted. 

Soon enough the two of them were laughing and enjoying their conversation, and Linkara did indeed start to forget about the guilt and sadness that had been plaguing him for some time. One thing he didn’t forget, though, was how much he enjoyed having 90s Kid not only as a teammate, but as a friend.

  



End file.
